There is tension and pressure in the household. Mom can’t handle us being here. Probably because of my decisions. I’ve always had guy friends-a lot more than I have had girls. But I think it’s weird for her to know I’m hanging out with them now, or when I have them over. Specially ones she has not met before. We’ve been avoiding one another for three days.
She told me she can see that my brother and I have lives and that she should get one too. Guess what. She’s been saying that for four years.
On another side of things. I have to go about my friendships differently. To trod carefully. I don’t usually. I don’t think I am managing them well. They are managng me. Because I’m floundering.
Two ‘friends’ have already dropped off because I didn’t want to be with them. There is fear in that. If I tell everyone I don’t want to be with them, do they all drop off?
I am terrified of being alone even though I know I should feel it.
But my best friends marriage two and a half years after her divorce, has never made more sense.