I just got back from the movies with you.
Afternoon movies with you. We’d never done that before.
And you were off,weren’t feeling like yourself, and you told me that within 3 minutes of picking me up.
Just more thinky, less happy and grinny. That grin that melts my heart into chocolate heart puddles! Oh how I ADORE it!
I went with it though. Held your hand in the theatres. You reached for mine too.
I rested my head on your shoulders. You laid yours on mine.
I took my seatbelt off 2 minutes from my house and i put my arms around you while you drove and I said I miss you and you said I miss you too and you reached for my hand. And I said I love you and I had tears and you said I love you too and ‘ no crying!’ and then we were pulling into the bumpy gravel driveway and I took awhile to get out. I just wanted to kiss you. But you were sad I know.
And our date, our little whatever time we had together today, had come to an end.
I got inside and felt sad and sick and that I wanted a drink. I grabbed a soda water out of the fridge like I was angry at it. If it had a brain it would have been afraid. I paced and had to keep busy had to keep busy. My happiness.. relies on how good we are. I can’t help it I can’t help it. It’s strictly attatched. Ugh.
Until next time dear ex boyfriend of mine.
and maybe, eventually,
you won’t be an ex.
That’s all my heart hopes for these days.