It occured to me tonight while reading over the italicized name of Lively Life.
When I think of those words together I think of someone who is out of the house until three minutes before it is time to sleep. Being around people, going to events, having a schedule that means pen in a full calender and and and.. just so not of what my life is like right now.
Maybe it is what I slightly aspire to have with mine. To have those busy weeks, impressing everyone with my sanity and ability to have it altogether in such seemingly so chaos. Being on time for everything. To be that exertion of happiness and energy, coffee in hand- even if just for the looks- dressed well, slim, and genuinly giving off the impression that life is enjoyed.
I don’t drink coffee for the looks. I drink it because with it in my system, I’m less cranky.
( At least that’s what I tell myself )
My calender is so blank that the only things I have on it are the days I’ve had my period, the 5th anniversary of a local restaurant and my work hours.
Well dressed- okay, I’ll admit I’m actually impressed with how far I’ve come in the last year. ( I remember moving back from abroad and being entirely befuddled with what style I wanted to get into. But that’s a post for another time ) I’m not the suit pants, blazers and blouses everyday wearer, but I can put together clothing pieces that resemble a sense of togetherness rather decently.
I do want a fast paced life. I am convinced I can handle it even though I haven’t had one since I was 19 and that didn’t involve a child. Yeah, I’ll have my days of complaint but overall, I think it’ll suit me.
When I changed my ‘name’ to LL from the previous one, I am certain that my reason for it ( the name, not the change ) was a mixture of two things.Merely me subconsciously digging back into those years when I WAS the outgoing, lifes a breeze and I’ve a handle on things.
recognition that my life isn’t boring right now, but that in me is ingrained the lively. I am the part that makes it so.
I am the Lively.