And when we have the choice to leave on a bad note or a better one-and we always have that choice- we know which one to choose. Not always the easiest, but always the best.
When you leave, leave with as much love in place as possible.
I grow and I learn,
and it is more common now
that I feel this happening.
I am aware and understanding
of the favorable and opposing.
I long to be strong and broken free
of this position I put myself in
time over and time under.
This is easier to accept then it was,
but it doesn’t go without struggle.
These that pull and push
not what I want
but at what length
what I will allow
and if I’m okay with feeling
like shite for it
every now and then.
I feel unFair and I am Feeling
that I let calibre go
just to feel the good I long for.
but who am i kidding,
My son is almost four months old.
I’m finally pretty darn confident I know what he wants each time he cries! I’ve learned it over the past while and it’s a hill I feel connected to and am proud about.
But there will always be hills when it comes to raising a child.
The next one that is already at my feet deals with habits.
I know what will stop my baby from crying but do I want him to depend on it months later? Do I want him to need my boob or for me to be laying next to him, in order to fall asleep?
This is something I’ve been faltering with.
This is a hill I must get over.
By doing so I will have to hear my baby cry more. I will have to use other things to soothe him… to vary it before dependence becomes an issue.
But he will for much longer, depend on the things I provide.
Depend on me for the things he needs.
If someone was talking about you and your best friend to someone else, whose name would come first? Would it be Jack and Lisa? or Lisa and Jack?
When you hear your mom talking to Aunt Liz on the phone about how you and your boyfriend are going to Cuba next week, whose name comes first? Yours or his?
You see, there’s a pattern.
Often times it starts where most things…do.
Bert and Ernie were always Bert and Ernie, right? How often do you hear Ernie and Bert?
Take Will and Grace or Mary-Kate and Ashley. It’s rarely said the other way around.
And Calvin and Hobbes?
What about Chip and Dale or Bonnie and Clyde?
Why do you think this is?
What is the significance of these un-flip-floppy names?