Warm swirling energetic chaos simmering inside- like a turtle about to start a race. You know you’re about to do great things.
The mind is so powerful. Can make or break your moment, your hour, your day. It’s difficult for those that struggle with taking control. To readjust your head, be authoritative and administer the care and direction. It is very worth it. And will continue to need tuning, and realignment. Sometimes you will react poorly to a comment and forget that you have the ability to regulate.
And sometimes these nice sugar dust brain waves, pair perfectly with that simmering chaos and you will know how beautiful it all is.
Let us lean into the uncomfortability. That vulnerability that each of us possess but yet often times do not activate or display. We are afraid of showing each other who we are.
Consider a present you are so excited to give someone. Whether you had to save four months to purchase it, or it took you six weeks to make. Think of that feeling. What if we felt the same way when we give the gift of who we are, to other people? Give your gift, the gift that only you can.
You for the sake of you for the sake of you for the sake of you.
I can hear the waves crashing on my shoulders
You understand now why I hold her.
I can’t see it clearly but maybe you can
and maybe that’s why we’re together
( so we can be )
( together )
until the end.
The end is where?
but where it has to be
in the very birthplace and time
of it’s life.
And I know you can take this better then me
it’s not like you were born ready,
Because you are so, so, so
better then so.
Kinda like nothing I feel good at explaining.
I take it this is where it goes from here
just where it’s supposed to.
Give me that, I’ll take this
don’t erase the wish.
Sometimes I find myself in a closed room sipping on sugar cubes of my past. I keep taking from the same bowl, these perfect little fresh six sided sweets.
I feel the sides, I take the angles and I let dissolve and I let absorb.
Like with too much of anything, my insides will begin to cringe and unfold their exasperation and disapproval.
Every once in awhile, I step inside this place where I roll in the mud of my past. I let myself feel awful for my decisions. I pull in blame and frustration and I coat the whole room in these colours. I am angry and I am determined. I can’t do anything but eat the sweets that turn so sour, to crawl into cave where all I do is feel bad and wonder how I could have messed up so terribly.
Deep down I know. I truly do know. I had to do my past the way that I did so that I could reach where I have. I do align myself with motivation and self awareness, help and understanding, yet these spaces of time come to me strong every so often. I don’t remember ever really pushing them away, but at least now I know that I have the ability to climb out. That in another day or four, I’ll be positive and upbeat again.
I’ll soak in my sweet sweet truth of my life; everything from my perspective to the actual. I’ll make myself sick with consumption of my frustration and feeling of stuck.
When I’m done doing that, I’ll lay in sun and let myself soak that. I’ll let myself be sick on content and the ever always, ebb and flow of life.