Life, we’re all doing it.
Some of us are doing it well, good, better, terrible.
I sometimes wonder whether the bad people out there, know they are bad people.
I didn’t know.
Until I had my heart broken.
Well, no. The thing is. I think I kinda had little bits flung at me throughout my life but I was so good at denying, ignoring, changing the subject to something else, that I never fully felt the impact or embraced the fact that I wasn’t being nice.
I’m sure I’m not the only one.
I was so good at manipulating my thoughts. I’m a nice person, but I abused other peoples emotions. That’s one of my biggest faults. WAS. I should say.
Since I’ve been on the other end of the rope, which really has only been a month and a half, I’ve learned through feeling like absolute crappola, that I was a friggen meanie.
I was mean to my best guy friends.
I always told myself, ” I’m not gonna be like a girl and hold in all my emotions and not tell them straight up that I’m not going to date them and let them hang onto that hope for pretty much 5 years and and… ” but I was EXACTLY that.
Like, what the heck. I don’t really know how that happened? I guess I just jumped on that train without realizing it, and kept going with it because it was making ME feel good.
I’m a selfish person. I’ve learned THAT over the years. So that’s something I intend to work on.
let’s stop being mean Jenny Dot.
That’s only gonna be a terrible attempt at living a full life.
That’s like E. On the empty.
And I don’t care to hear a ‘ beep beep, ding ding’ every km I’m closer to stalling out.
I have posted the above only a few minutes ago and once posted I had thoughts that pressed against my brain skull and said, ” Yo, everyones’ life is lived on different standards and we all have our own opinion and idea on what a life well lived or a life well not, is. Every individual do have their problems which in turn changes there position on decisions, on actions, on things we see, but do not see beyond. In saying this after my post, I’d just like to conclude that to me, how a life is lived includes many many factors. I could be living the worst choiced life in the eyes of another.
A life well lived is a life of purpose.
A life well lived is a loving, friendly, nice to people life.
A life well lived is of happiness and not of harming others.
A life well live…. and it can go on and on.
Living is learning.
As long as you are living, you are learning of yourself, about others, about nature, about new, about old.
We have a heart, mind and a conciousness that gives shovels to our heart arms,
so that we can dig deep into our self.
Maybe a life well lived is learning the most we can about ourselves as a human being.
The complexities, the intricices, the simplicities.
Or maybe it’s hugging every single experience in the gut,
and saying, ‘ Yo, You made me cry and drink for two weeks straight, but I learned from you and I’m here on out, a better person because of you. Thanks man!’
Maybe just maybe,
living a life well lived is loving the life we’re choosing.
I just connected these two….
the last line of