There are certain people to talk to about certain things.
Almost anyone can get an earful of venting at times, yet it’s nice to decipher which topic in general, your audience is most suited for.
The kid one is easy. If they don’t have children, don’t gab on about the rate at which yours is growing, that he or she had six bananas on Tuesday and got their hair styled into a mohawk on Friday. If it’s relatable to a discussion you are already in, a quick mention will do.
Pets. As much as half the world can seem like they are animal lovers, half the world only means there’s another half. Fur, tricks and whiskers are not for everyone.
People like to relate to whatever comes out of your mouth. If you’re speaking of your international travels when they have merely gone to the big shopping mall 4 hours away, chances are it’s a short circuit of a conversation.
Find someone in your life that really loves fashion, so when you have an outfit predicament, you’re going to them and not the one who wears scrubs for a living AND outside of living.
If you need to get marital issues off your chest, ( obviously a marriage counsellor is an option ) find the friend that has went through similar problems and can benefit from talking to YOU about such things.
You’ll find the bonds between new people you meet will manifest easily and quickly and that existing relationships will be strengthened ten fold.
This week I figured out why I value questions.
They are important to me because it is the way that I reveal myself.
I became interested in communication in highschool. I didn’t know it then, but that is what was happening. I realised that people like to talk and that there are a lot more talkers out there then listeners. And I’m a people pleaser.
So I became quiet and listened and didn’t say much.
Until I’ve reached this point in my life where I’m making things more difficult because I am not speaking.
“Why didn’t you just tell me that then?”
“Because you didn’t ask me.”
” I thought you would just tell me whatever you wanted. You know I want to hear anything you have to say.”
I have had these conversations numerous times. With my old best friends.
I know I have tried to be better. To assert myself and to give out information freely.
But it is so easy to not.
It is so easy to sit back and glide with the current of all the others.
It sounds terrible. I know.
But I learn a lot this way.
I learn a lot about myself.
I learn how naive people can be. How much they can not not know about their ‘friend’.
My friends don’t know who I am anymore as a result of my silence.
I’ve been open. I’ve been free and fine to tell people a lot of things.
But they haven’t asked me.
So I find myself in this room of doubt.
Maybe I don’t want them to know these things about me.
It has started to become way too comfortable. It has become something I use.
Guilt becomes less of a threat because noone is asking me things that make me feel it.
To make me turn in on myself.
It is a dangerous place but this is how I came to the understanding of why questions are important to me.