If we discontinued our lashing out at people and slow motioned our time with our reactions, I think we’d find a lot less irritable of a person inside of us.
I get that reactions are initial. They’re quite beautiful in that respect. Your response is beautiful in just the opposite way. You DO have time.
It’s like feeding the heart celery. As you make the decisions to respond after letting yourself think, you gain the creation of a possible habit and lose 6 pounds of ego centered mud.
Half the time do we even want to respond wearing a coat of anger?
Shedding that will take time and practice but we’ll feel a lot lighter and have less resistance towards people around us.
Besides, after a situation in reacting poorly, how many times does it return to a safe, comfortable place again?
So just skip the part where you insult others and just be collected and calm to begin with. That will generate enough good loving warmth that makes wearing the damn coat severely impractical.
Your clock turns my times into believable spells of intuition. The way your time collapses onto my shoulder every few months doesn’t confuse me anymore. Your hands are moved by love, your seconds spew bullets of man made hope and the days you long for are the ones that would tick to the beat of my belly. But oh great one; the forever of your time can’t be connected with mine because your fear of our past is the Wall of Prevention.
The time told me I had little left
so I hopped on a bus and let it take me where I ended up.
I didn’t do much there, just painted my nails and such.
I feasted on freedom
and downed optimism so quick I hiccuped for an hour after.
I didn’t worry about anything and it was easy and calm and hopeful.
So when I arrived back, the planet in my heart had more land of bright
and it affected the rest of my imagination space
and as long as time is,
I’ll always have that.
Even when I can’t remember where I put it.
I grow and I learn,
and it is more common now
that I feel this happening.
I am aware and understanding
of the favorable and opposing.
I long to be strong and broken free
of this position I put myself in
time over and time under.
This is easier to accept then it was,
but it doesn’t go without struggle.
These that pull and push
not what I want
but at what length
what I will allow
and if I’m okay with feeling
like shite for it
every now and then.
I feel unFair and I am Feeling
that I let calibre go
just to feel the good I long for.
Do you ever think back to a time period with someone and can’t remember who you really were?
A few years spent together with a person and you can’t bring your imagination to recreate how you were, how you felt.
Thoughts like these make me wonder me.
If I’m to change so drastically again- as perhaps is a continual cycle- then I and the people in my life will either have to adapt together on this or be left in the past.
Present me knows that whoever I end up choosing to spend my entire life with, has to know that the Future me could potentially forget who I was. That Present me will change.
So it is important that the Present Other knows my heart and my core – and loves THOSE parts of me. Not the ones that will change so extremely.